xtherealmrbungle (turkeybaster7) wrote in fachooff,

so i'm a 55 year old woman.

ok, so i'm a 55 year old woman and new york native. every friday the kids go to their grandmother's and me and the husband, al, have a moment. Well last friday i wasnt in the mood to have a "moment" but of course al was so i told him to back off, head up to bed, and i would be there when i was done with the dishes. so i did the dishes slower than i have ever done them before, i mean like a half hour later i was done and i stopped to call to my mutha and was just askin about the kids and what not. so i figure he must be asleep now. so i sneak up these old wooden steps, my house was built in 1911 ya know, and the stairs are skweky so i stopped and listened and i heard him snoring so i thought thank god i'm in the clear. so i creep under the blankets and turn off to the side so if he wakes up looking for the moment i can pretend to be asleep. so not a min. later and i look over and i see the blanket moving up and down in a fast motion. so i thought 'what kind a pervert did i marry?'
so i turned over and tried to ignore it but now it was really beatin on the blanket so i turned back over and thought hey i'm gonna embarass this jerk. i grabbed ahold of the blanket and ripped it off and screamed 'HA I GOT YA YA PERV!' and i looked down and right between his legs was the cat. it was pawing at its ear. i couldnt beleive it. i was soo embarrassed and then of course he woke up and turned to saying ' aw your finally here'. so we went threw the motions 'oh yeah, thats right, give it to me.' *turns on the tv*.
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